Fix it or throw it away?

For so many people, having that friend on whom they can fall back on when the going gets tough, is just as important as having money is. It is actually a very good thing, as everyone needs some form of support system.

A large number of people have found this person in a boyfriend/girlfriend with whom they have a romantic relationship with. In this situation, if the ship capsizes, we can conclude that they're not compatible for each other, hence the need to separate, or we can conclude that one of the partners is toxic, or some other reasons people give for breaking up with their partners. After the breakup, they move on with their lives after a few months, express regrets and all other emotions that come with breakups.

However, this is not the case with friendships. A lot of adults have friends from childhood, with whom they connect so perfectly. Some are close friends with people whom they met a few years back, probably in university or in one of these social gatherings where people are given the opportunity to make connections.

Regardless of where people make their friends, it is an undisputed fact that they invest so much in these platonic relationships. They are tightly bound, as they share their daily experiences, their wins and losses, gossip, life-changing opportunities, and all other things that come with friendship. They would even fight and make up, just like good friends do. It is this connection which has been made overtime that differentiates close friends from just regular friends.

One could fall out with a regular friend with whom they say hi's to during class in university or share a table with at lunch, and won't even feel an effect of it.

There's an important need to distinguish between actual friends and acquaintances. Yes, this difference is what helps draw the line between a friendship that should be abandoned because it's unnecessary, and one that should be fixed when issues arise and should be invested in.

When people have issues with their close friends, it hits them at a spot deep down in their hearts. For the days or weeks when they won't be in speaking terms, or for those moments when conversations turn sour and awkward, it feels like an integral part of this person has been taken out. Sometimes, our subconscious tells us to fix the situation, but many times, our ego stands in the way.

An issue that can be resolved with just a phone call would be left unattended due to some smelly pride that never does any good.

Fixing relationships that have proven to be premium and rare is nothing to feel arrogant about. 

The hurt that comes with an issue in close friendship is second to none.

Sometimes, this hurt is inevitable, as the nature of humans is simply unjust. Having a friend betray your trust would hurt badly, and in this case, staying by oneself is best.

But in the situation when the separation is caused by misunderstandings, then it is important that we put the importance of these friendships first. Weigh the situation to know if such an issue is enough to throw an important friendship as that into the wind.

If your heart judges you, then you should do the friendship the honour of speaking to the said friend and ironing things out.

Irrespective of where you go to or what you become or who you eventually end up with in life, having friends who can have your back is important. You need the fellowship of friends whom you love and trust. At the end, they're the ones who would be there for you if the going ever goes bad. Good friends add that extra spice to one's life.

The art of detachment, however, is as hard as the rocks in Abeokuta, Nigeria.

You have to ignore each other, pretend to be happy when you're not, try to forget memories you had together.

It is just as hard as moving on from a lover with whom you pictured your future with.

The first thing to do as stated earlier is to examine the situation. If the reason for separating from that friend is not consoling enough, then the separation isn't needed at all.

Secondly, take a breath of fresh air. Explore new things alone. Meet new people and have light conversations. Don't be idle, so much that you're pulled down by the weight of your sadness.

Thirdly, make up your mind to be fine without that person, or simply set up a meeting to discuss the bone of contention.

In all you do, know that friendship is a highly valuable concept, and your true friends would be there for you come rain, come sunshine.

Also, remember that your friends are human beings, and so they deserve a second chance in times when they err.

Learn the art of forgiveness, as it is the ingredient that preserves friendship.

Be a tolerant and tolerable friend too.

Lastly, show your friends that the friendship is highly valuable to you. 

People appreciate people when they are shown that what they share in common is cherished.

We've come to the end of this post. If you feel like some important points were left out in this post, do well to drop your two cents in the comments section.

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You never can tell which of them needs this now.