Dealing with exhaustion

Clears out cobwebs *coughs*

*Tiptoes in*  

Hey lovelies,

It's been over a year of ghosting you. What if I say it's not entirely my fault? Will you believe me? 

2022 was quite a lot, and 2023 was the year I graduated from the university. Just imagine that combo, a lot plus final year. Phew! I'm glad to be back. Seriously, 2022 nearly took my life, but mercy said no. 

Life got so overwhelming that I had to shed as much "weight" as possible. I became less and less active on social media and stopped writing for the blog. The things I went through took a toll on my dedication to being a content writer, especially for this blog which doubles as a writing portfolio for me. I used to be a Twitter girlie with online friends, but all that disappeared with time. This  blog which used to be my happy place got zero attention from me. Sincerely, all through the years I was away, I felt this guilt that only me could place upon myself. Friends of the blog would meet me outside and ask about Zee's Diary, and I would tell them about how I still had unpublished episodes but I didn't have the zeal to put them up here. I guess that phase is over now.

Looking on the brighter side, I did quite a number of amazing things. I got awarded as the volunteer of the month at the NGO I volunteered  for at the first quarter of 2022, learned UI/UX design and was able to land a four-month internship, I wrote my undergraduate thesis by myself and got compliments on my work during my defence, and most importantly, I graduated from the university. I'm still a champ after all. 

I'm glad to be back here to share with and entertain you with my thoughts which overflow in tranquillity.

Let's talk about how becoming adults has been so exhausting. I'm literally in my early twenties, and I feel so exhausted. I would say to myself and my friends, “I just feel this inner exhaustion”. I've also noticed this same pattern with several other people within the same age range as me. Anyway, I have found a coping mechanism for myself and I'm glad to share it with you, with the hope that it helps you.

Let's begin by talking about the meaning and causes of this exhaustion. Exhaustion is a state of extreme physical or mental stress. I'm not a psychologist, but by observing myself and others around me, I've been able to think of the different reasons we feel exhausted:

1.  The thoughts of not doing and being enough.

As young people, we are constantly trying to create an identity for ourselves, so it is exhausting when our plans don't fall through. Those disappointments despite our efforts are quite tiring, and when these things build up overtime, it leads to some inner exhaustion that lingers for some time, until something interesting comes and distracts us from it. 

2. Being temporarily unable to dispense cash.

Most young people are fueled by their ability to make money to spend on themselves and the things they care about. It makes us feel in control. While money isn't everything that there is to life, it is impossible to take away the place of finances in the mood and wellbeing of young people. Most actions taken by many young people today are geared towards the possibility of making money. Therefore, it is quite disappointing to watch your mates "make it" while your plans fail or are taking too long to materialise. 

3. Boredom.

Seriously, let's talk about the toll boredom takes on you when it lingers for too long. I know the buzz with GenZ and loving soft life, but have you seen what boredom does to people? Just imagine being at home all day, all week. It would feel great doing nothing and resting initially, but overtime, you would begin to feel like something is missing in your life. 

4. Unemployment.

It is uninspiring to be unemployed when you have employable skills, and probably a degree. Worse off when you need a job to get paid to survive. The constant application for jobs, watching your neighbours go to work and seeing your friends rant about work issues, and more heart wrenching, the rejection letters that grace our emails. Being unemployed is most times accompanied by an empty pocket, thereby making us feel exhausted about life.

Here are ways I've been able to manoeuvre this feeling of exhaustion. For everything we face as humans, we try to develop coping mechanisms; something that would help us through different phases in our lives:

1. Hanging out with friends and family.

We all must have seen those tweets that say we get tired of life till we hang out with friends and life suddenly feels worth living. There is something that spending time with friends and family does to our mood. The laughter and banter just makes life worth living again. It does not always have to be expensive. I remember having weird birthdays from age 16 till I turned 21. I decided to hangout with a friend for my birthday. We were broke, but I could afford food for us. We ate, shared jokes, took pictures and went for a walk in the mall, window-shopping. That particular experience made me decide to not spend my birthday at home and alone anymore. There are several places you can meet your loved ones to spend time together, such as their house, an eatery, a park, a gaming centre, etc. The list is endless, depending on your pocket. All the times I have chosen to hang out with friends, probably eating ice cream and chatting were 100% worth it. Even if you consider yourself an introvert, you should try this suggestion once or twice and observe the outcome. It’s always a great and worthwhile experience.

2. Do things that improve the quality of life during the waiting time.

While you're waiting for that congratulatory email to come in, it is imperative that we find things to do that improve our lives. It could be an hour of practising writing daily; two hours of practising design daily; two hours of practising content creation; or an hour of taking that professional course daily. It could be anything, but ensure it is something you know is improving your life or skills. Remember, little drops of water make an ocean. Instead of staying down and wallowing in tiredness and frustration, you should do things that bring about improvement in your life. 

3. Read a book.

I know this sounds cliche, but just hear me out. Personally, reading books is quite stimulating. What I do when I feel exhausted sometimes is to read one of those many books that I've saved. I'm a sucker for African novels. I would read anything Nigerian, Ghanaian, I mean anything African. Other times, I read design books to stay on top of my design game. 

 

4. Watch movies.

For someone who spent many years struggling with watching movies, it is strange that I would suggest watching movies as a way of relieving exhaustion. Watching movies is a great way to unwind. I remember when I was a student, I’d watch a movie whenever I felt overwhelmed after reading. It worked for me, because I always ended up feeling refreshed. You should try movies whenever you feel exhausted.

5. Keep applying for jobs.

The solution to unemployment is not quitting. If you're not getting any replies at all from your applications, you should consider sending your resume and portfolio to your mentor to access for you, so that they can help you with corrections that can improve your chances in getting replies to your applications. If you don’t have a mentor, you can ask anyone whose judgement you trust, or a veteran in your area of specialisation to help out with accessing your resume.

6. Work for free.

Hear me out, please. I know the economy is quite unfavourable to be advising you to work for free at the moment, but you need to do something to improve your skills. Since you're still unemployed and have little or no experience, working for free isn't such a bad idea. Volunteering for roles you wish to get full time employment in is a great idea, because you don't only gain the experience. You also get to improve your skills. As long as you're not spending your personal money while doing the job, then there's no harm in working for free.

So dear readers, hang in there. Things would get better with time. Don't lose hope. It's not easy for everyone. Even Adekunle God told us that the grass is green on the other side until he took the ride down there. I would love to hear your thoughts on exhaustion and how you pull through it.

It is a delight writing for The Olise Blog again. Stay tuned for more posts like this from me.